A Frozen Lake and Barcelona

David, old favorite on the blog, came to visit us a few weeks ago. We were really excited because we would have one day in Gothenburg, then shoot up to Kiruna for four and a half days of far-north activities: northern lights, dog sleds, ice hotels, Arctic Circle - the works. We did lots of Gothenburg things the day after he arrived. One big surprise for all of us was Delsjön! It had been (and is now again) ass-cold in the entire country. Lots and lots of snow and temperatures hanging around -5 to -10! I wanted to take David on my "regular walk" through the woods but when we got to the lake this is what we saw:

2017: the year I actually started fitting in to Sweden

(ok not gonna lie - this post is basically impossible to read. My blog has finally died. Try it here on Medium: https://medium.com/@heyamberwilkie/2017-the-year-i-actually-started-fitting-in-to-sweden-2c6bb7b74079) When 2016 ended, we celebrated by lighting dumpster fires. Of course, 2017 was always going to be worse - that's when these people we elected actually attempt to "govern". That said, it certainly feels different. 2016 ended with a slug to the chest. In 2017 we feel prepared, vigilant, awake. For me personally, 2017 was a bit of a growing-up year. I have those sometimes. They can be fun-ish but you also have to have a bit of a come-to-Jesus talk with yourself. At one point, at work (I'll get there), I was chatting with a colleague who was feeling down. They couldn't quite put their finger on what was wrong. "What is the point of any of this?" I suggested as the major problem for this person. "Um yeah," they said. Bingo - growing up. So let's talk about work!  

I got a job

If you'll recall, in 2016 I enrolled in a three-month programming bootcamp. It's the only one I've taken, so I can't compare it to anything else. It worked for me, and I saw plenty of people fail. When the camp ended, the director hired me to coach and I did that for maybe a month before I knew I had to get the hell out. Actually leaving took me from more or less the beginning of this year until April. I wrote a long, long post about it (and that's a link to my "tech" blog where I post everything that is not 100% personal). I landed at Studentvikarie, a growing start-up that connects substitute teachers with the schools that need them. I work on everything except for the app - the platform our support staff uses to administrate the various parts of the business, the school site where school administrators can book and manage their temporary jobs, and the teacher site where the substitutes can view and accept jobs. For those who care, we use a React front-end and a Rails back-end. To be frank, I like this job as much as I can imagine liking any job. My current boss is the only manager I've ever had that I get along with. I thought maybe I was broken, but it seems that there's at least a sliver of management under which I can thrive. But still that "what is the point of any of this?" crops up. I don't have an answer. You just do the work (which is great fun almost always) and hope the rest of it shakes out.

I traveled

I forgot to post a 2016-in-summary last year. My happy-anniversary-to-George post had to suffice. Yeah, I forgot that one this year too. Actually we forgot to even take a damn selfie on our eight year anniversary so I'm hoping to remember to do that on Christmas. Likely I forgot to do the year-in-review because I was in Morocco having a blast and being challenged. Post one. Post two. I also blogged Lisbon, but then I basically quit with the blogging thing. Maybe it's over or maybe it's just over for me, but actually writing up a blog post was such a drag I wasn't getting around to it for months. Now I Instagram things. If you want to see my travel photos, that's where you should head. I'm @heyamberwilkie Alright, so for those counting, we've got Morocco and Lisbon. This year I've also traveled to: Stockholm, Copenhagen, Paris, Northern and regular ol' Ireland, Norway (for two days on the -in-a-Nutshell tour), Greece (Athens), Switzerland (Lausanne & a little Geneva), and London. Up on the 2018 docket is at least Kiruna in February and I'm headed back to the USA for the first time in more than two years in April. It's finally time to see David's new house. I intend to eat all the things and also buy cheap shit at Target and generally scratch whatever this uncomfortable itch is that has me feeling like something is just a little bit off. I also realize it may be that I'm not 100% comfortable anywhere anymore and that would be ok too.

I danced and I yoga-ed

Sweden has a somewhat amazing constellation of community classes and study circles. Until this Fall I hadn't felt strong enough in my Swedish to sign up for anything. But starting in September I was taking Modern Dance every Monday. It's physically demanding and I get the impression that I'm fucking terrible at it, but the teacher is encouraging and my classmates are nice enough. I'll probably keep going. I've had a home yoga practice for years now. I try to get up and do 20 minutes every morning, though I certainly can't claim that ambition always plays out. It's much harder to drag myself out of bed in the winter when it's so damn dark. There are free yoga sessions every week here in town and I've been twice in a row now. I know after going the first time it is going to be much easier to show up. I'm also taking an intensive meditation/yoga course starting Tuesday to give myself something to do during "the boring week" and also to start the year with my head in a good space. I'll also put in this "health" section that I have "a massage guy" now and it's really great. He hurts the shit out of my every time I go, but I have way less pain in my neck and shoulders. And I get to use my health plan money (from work) to help offset the costs. Win win win.

My marriage is still killing it

George and I are still rocking the wedding bands, though neither of us actually wear a wedding band anymore. Sweden will do that to you. We're getting older, but we still love each other and whatnot. I think, after living in Sweden for two years, I feel more independent than perhaps I did in DC. Maybe because I was very dependent on him for the first half of 2016 - he was working and I was not. And now that I've come out of that space, I feel more like my own person, capable of taking care of whatever comes my way. Fortunately we aren't threatened by each others' independence, so this is mostly a good development, as far as I'm concerned. I frequently travel alone, spend much of my weekend leisure activities alone (walks through the woods are a favorite past time) and generally try to take care of my own entertainment. It doesn't always work but we're getting there. My annual post of a bunch of photos of us together Ait Benhaddou, Morocco (mostly abandoned city made entirely of clay and now used as a movie set and tourist attraction) During our camel ride out to the desert camp. Totally counts. At Little Skellig (you'll recognize this island from the new Star Wars movie). Some little town on Ireland's west coast. I don't know why we're so happy. Probably because we just ate some massive meal. On the fjord tour in Norway

I read

Thanks to Goodreads, I can just rattle off the books I read in 2017. I put a star on books I particularly enjoyed.
  • The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, Mark Manson*

Travel | Lisbon

This trip to Lisbon was supposed to be a trip to visit David and eat all the things in DC, but he was hosting other folks. I planned a week off between jobs, but then found myself in need of a new travel plan. In Europe, this is never a problem. You pop your dates into Momondo and see where you can fly for reasonably cheap. Portugal, they said. And so it was. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com The first thing you do after somewhere from Sweden is breathe a sweet sigh of relief that it is warm here. That's exactly what I did on my first morning. I woke up early and walked down by the ocean, which was not blowing ice air in my face. It was the day after the French elections and the Portuguese people were feeling lucky at least some parts of Europe were not choosing the path of populism, bigotry and fear. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com It did seem a bit wrong to arrive in Lisbon and immediately jet for Sintra, but that's exactly what I did. The weather people were predicting lots of rain for the rest of the week. Forty minutes later, I was in the tiny resort town famous for its royal palace up on the mountain. The Pena Palace is a pretty crazy place - colorful, remote, and surrounded by the most delightful gardens.     © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com View of the Moorish castle from the Pena Palace. I did visit it, but by that point I was so exhausted from walking up and down all these hills I did a bit of an in-and-out situation. It was a cool ruin that the king and such renovated. People of the past liked hanging out in ruins as well.     © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com Honestly, I would skip the actual ticket for the palace. You see the inside, and they are some small royal apartments that look like a lot of other royal apartments. With the entrance to the gardens, you get to do all the really great stuff with the castle - walk around the walls, just go around and see the views and stuff. The inside is missable, unless you are into taking pictures of people juxtaposed with butts. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com These were so baller royal gardens. Normally you have some manicured hedges and things to walk around, or just a big old forest that is also nice. But these had all these lovely little spots to stop and look at things - like this 16th century well built by monks and fed by water from a mine. There were benches where the queen used to sit and little groves and meditation caves. They were the best royal gardens I've seen and I've managed to see a whole bunch of royal gardens. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com I hit up the aforementioned Moorish Ruins and then bolted back to town to hop on the Chill Out Lisbon tour, which promised to be a tour about non-touristy stuff but was basically just your normal walking tour, but long (four hours!) We saw Barrio Alto, a bit of the Baixa and the Alfama, the oldest district in the city. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com Lisbon is a bit of a weird place. It seems pretty active and prosperous and vibrant, but there are lots of abandoned buildings and things that are weirdly run-down. There were broken windows on what was essentially a back-side of the national palace. That's... weird. I honestly didn't learn much about modern Lisbon but in 1755, there was a huge earthquake and tsunami and 80% of the city was destroyed. Areas was up on the hills (Lisbon is very hilly) like Barrio Alto and Alfama were spared a lot of the damage of their lower neighbors, but that probably just means the buildings are much harder to maintain now. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com This was one of the most beautiful trees I have ever seen. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com After the Chill Out tour, I was starting to feel pretty crummy. I woke up the next day determined not to be sick and pressed on through some wanderings around town. I did come back to the hostel and take a long nap in the afternoon, before setting off again in the evening. By the time I got back, I realized I was in for some serious down-time. The following day, I barely left the hostel - just to get some lunch and then later for a little stroll. I spent most of the day hauled up in the TV room of the hostel watching movies and feeling miserable. Nothing like being sick on vacation, in a public place, with no kitchen and no private bathroom. I was also supposed to travel to Porto that day for two nights, but I canceled it. What's the point of being sick in a new, more foreign place? So I never made it to Porto. Fortunately, I felt much better the next morning! © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com Lisbon is hilly as fuck. My legs hurt so damn much when I was sick - that achey feeling when you are really ill but exacerbated by serious normal-soreness from walking up and down hills all day. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com They kept this church as a partial ruin to remind everybody about the earthquake. It was a pretty big deal in Lisbon's history. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com Lunch in Bélem - grilled sardines. I heard they were not quite in season, but who cares? I'm a tourist. Bélem also is home to the famous Pasteles de Nata, which are amazing little custard tarts. In Bélem, they crank out something like 20k/day, so they are hot out of the oven when you eat them and so, so tasty. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com Bélem is also home to the Jerónimos Monastery, a pretty seriously awesome-looking courtyard thing. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com I went home and forced another nap because I was hanging around 75%. And then managed to get it up enough to go on a Fado night with other folks from the hostel. It was nice enough, but, as normally happens when I attempt to experience the "local music", I was pretty bored. Fado is lovely but old-school. My hostel, Travelers' Hostel, had a really interesting mix of folks. A fair amount of party people, as is common with all hostels, but a number of folks my age and even some legit older folks. It's always nice to find a hostel that is catering to all types and not just the free-shots-bar-crawl crowd. The next day, I went to the Oceanarium. I've been on a bit of an octopus kick lately after reading Soul of an Octopus. I like to travel alone expressly for this reason: I can go do something stupid like visit the aquarium. It's what I felt like doing, and so I did it. There were fishes. It was lovely. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com I had heard all about hipster-haven Lx Factory but it was all sit-down restaurants and I just wasn't feeling it. © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com That evening I had the most amazing dinner. 20170512_190624 I declare crab to be the perfect solo fancy dinner choice. First, it's super-delicious. Which is great for times when you are dining with others as well. But crab also takes forever to eat. One can enjoy the ambiance, while having something to focus your attention on. I happened to be sitting in front of the crab tank and the little guys watched me eat my meal. I actually saw this bugger get scooped out of the tank, which I admit did give me the teeniest, tiniest pause. But then this meal arrived and I just dived in. Eating this made me deliriously happy (plus two glasses of wine). © 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com© 2017 Amber Wilkie Photography | www.amberwilkie.com A little extra strolling the morning before my flight, and that was that! I really enjoyed Portugal and I'm sure I'll be back, hopefully with fewer viruses brewing in me.