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Tag Archives: marriage thoughts

Happy third anniversary to my husband!

Y’all, I’ve mentioned how much I enjoy being married to George.  He’s so freakin’ rad.  On our first and second anniversaries, I wrote little ditties about how much I love him blah blah blah. And this year I don’t feel compelled to do that. I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing… as far as I can tell, in a successful marriage, you sort of settle into each other. So things don’t seem extraordinary all the time – they’re just really nice, really comfortable, really warm and loving and cozy.  Plus, I get to be married to this stud!  I love this image I snapped of my man at Chris and Shubha’s wedding earlier this year.

That’s my guy. In the dork-ass constellation tie I bought him that he actually loves and wears all the time.

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Your marriage isn’t special

I was talking with a bunch of wedding photographers recently (we hang out in packs, yes) about this post I’ve been meaning to write but wasn’t sure it would be well-received.  They encouraged me to go for it (because they want to see my business go down in flames?) so here I am.  You’re going to have to hang with me for a paragraph or two – don’t leave on “your marriage isn’t special” – let me get to why on earth I would say this to engaged people.

[A note before I go: I want to say that I don’t consider “marriage” a very different thing than “exclusive for-life commitment.”  I know some people either don’t want to or are prevented from legally marrying.  But love is still the same.]

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Marriage Thoughts | Keep your last name somewhere

I have a long list of “marriage thoughts” I always mean to write and never get around to.  George and I tied the knot in December 2009 so I’ve got solid 1.5 years of marriage experience, which is 1.5 years more than my about-to-be-married couples, making me incredibly wise, right?  In any case, there are some things I’ve learned about being married and I’d like to share with the engaged crowd. So here’s marriage tip #1:

Keep your maiden name somewhere.

I was very torn about the take-his-name or don’t-take-his-name dilemma.  On the one hand, I really liked my name before (Amber Lupin) – it’s just so symmetrical and it also creates great anagrams (Brian Plume, for instance).  On the other hand, George really wanted me to take his name.  We once had this conversation, which convinced me to do it:

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